I’m a sucker for a good podcast. 

I’m also a sucker for learning more about new topics.

TED Radio Hour naturally is a podcast I come back to again and again, and one series they shared inspired me. So know that the episodes titled “Work, Play, Rest” largely inspired this post.

How so? These three words are basic building blocks that enable individuals to function as a healthy adults.

Sadly many freshmen struggle to implement these habits into their lives until years of struggling through college.

So before you pack your vehicle to drive to your child’s college campus, consider how you can emphasize the importance of these 3 habits:

1. Work

2. Play 

3. Rest

Work

This probably seems like the most obvious habit your incoming freshman should embrace, but working hard should be a part of your child’s college experience.

College is hard work. It takes discipline, sacrifice, and focus to succeed in college.

Sometimes your freshman, however, can feel powerless in their work. In reality, they have more control over their coursework than they think.

How can you help them take ownership over their hard coursework? Here are some suggestions:

• Encourage using time-blocking. I’ve discussed this concept before, but it is worth mentioning again. Sitting down and creating an overview of their weekly schedule helps your freshman see how much time they really have. Blocking out time to accomplish their coursework helps the “work” part of college seem more manageable.

• Encourage using a planner. Freshmen tend to love, hate, or be ignorant of planners. Many think that simply using their syllabi or online course pages is easier or more helpful. It isn’t. Whether electronic or physical, every freshman should use a planner if they want to experience academic success. 

• Encourage changing their environment. It’s tempting–very tempting–to stay in their dorm room to complete homework. The reality is that this space is usually not helpful. If they’re tired, they’ll be tempted to nap their evenings away. If they’re unmotivated, they’ll likely be tempted to play a show in the background (at least at first). Going into an atmosphere that is designated for study will make working hard easier.

Play

This may be what your incoming freshman expects of college–constant partying and socializing.

(In reality, college includes more alone time and a greater need for tenacity than many freshmen expect.)

But “play” doesn’t necessarily look like going to large social gatherings or exciting adventures.

“Play” often looks like reframing our approach to making friends, conquering challenging classes, and more.

This practice can help your freshman have a healthier approach to the tasks ahead.

So how can you help? Here are some suggestions:

• Place little emphasis on grades and more emphasis on learning. College is expensive, which is why many parents can place a big importance on earning all As. But college provides much more. It provides constant opportunities for your freshman to learn about themselves, others, the world around them, and more. Pressuring your incoming freshman for high grades will likely zap the “play” out of their college education.

• Encourage a limited number of extracurriculars. Exploring skills and interests outside your child’s major can not only help them meet people but also help them take a break from their coursework. Having healthy coping mechanisms to deal with stress is key to your child’s success in and out of the classroom.

• Schedule time to “play.” In my six years of teaching, there were many times where I asked struggling students if they planned fun activities into their schedule. Almost every time I was met with confused looks. Planning for play is key. Setting that example for your freshman is important too. Even if only a few weeks are left, making plans for small moments of “play” in your family schedule may help highlight the importance of this habit.

Rest

For most of my life, I thought of “rest” as simply sleeping.

Rest includes more than long afternoon naps or extra nights of sleep. (Both are unlikely to be a realistic expectation for your incoming freshmen.)

But without rest, your freshman won’t be able to sustain the busy pace of college life.

So how can you help your freshman understand the need for rest and prioritize it? Here are a few suggestions:

• Encourage taking breaks. When they’re feeling stuck or overwhelmed, they’ll be tempted to push through or give up. Instead, they may need to simply go on a short walk or take a 5-minute break. These small choices can help your freshman deal with the stress they will inevitably feel in a healthier way.

• Establish waking up and going down routines. While your incoming freshman will likely be tired enough to fall asleep at any point. Creating even small little habits that help them wind-down at the end of the day can help them rest before sleeping. And then in the morning, creating a margin for some journaling or meditating of some kind can help them set the tone for their day.

These ideas are not comprehensive.

The reality is that you can encourage or urge your freshman all you want, but they still may do their own thing.

Sometimes trial-and-error is the best teacher. But when this occurs, being there for them, asking an insightful question, and listening without offering advice can help them recall all the things they’ve seen you do and heard you say in the past.

College is a wonderful environment for your incoming freshman to start learning a healthy lifestyle incorporates work, play, and rest.